Great news everyone thanks to my significant advances in modern algorithmic analysis I am personally able to outperform a warehouse full of specialized GPUs by five orders of magnitude with a single ARM core for one one-millionth the cost in 0.1% of the time by training the "cp" command on only the GCC source and then compiling the output of that program with GCC.
The resulting compiler - which I'm calling "mhoyecc", or as I've taken to calling it, mhoye plus cc, passes 100% of GCC's tests.